Thought #8: Unlearning

Thought: We can’t be angry at people who display bigoted behaviours and thoughts. Bigotry can stem from a lack of knowledge. We can’t be mad if people don’t know something. We need to teach them. If after teaching, displaying the facts (white is not superior to non-white, men are not superior to women, “normal” is not superior to “abnormal”), and still a complete disregard is still shown, that is when we should be upset, not for ourselves but for that person. It must be hard to live in a head that can’t stop hating  when living in a world that is showing us how important it is to love each other.  

A Story of a Hate Crime

One of my amazing friends and fellow Madvocate has written about her hateful experiences while attending Canada’s top theatre school. No words I say can describe the stupidity of what Flossie experienced but she does it amazingly and will make you laugh while enraging you! Although these people ended her theatre career she will not let that stop her! She still acts in Canadian film, tv shows and commercials and is looking to change how theatre is taught to aspiring actors!

Read her part 1 of her story “Downtown Famous”

http://www.scribd.com/doc/60176499/Downtown-Famous-Part-I

Owning My Words

An amazing friend of mine, Flossie McKnight, has created a series of videos that talk about bigotry, mental illness, Canadian Theatre, and surviving (please watch them, they are awesome and she is the most entertaining person I know). One video in particular inspired this post and it’s her video called “Own Your Words” (see video clip).

In this clip Flossie talks about how, as a victim in physical, emotional, and psychological bullying in her high school, found herself helping to perpetuating the bullying of another girl at her school.

Her message is that we have all played roles in creating someones own personal hell. Sometimes it’s as “harmless” as allowing a rumor to spread or as dangerous as physical, emotionally or psychologically tormenting someone everyday. We need to be able to acknowledge our roles.

It can’t and shouldn’t stop at acknowledgement. We need to learn and grow from the wrongs that we have done which is Flossie’s main message. She now uses her experiences to create videos such as the one above and engage in mental health and sexual assault activism which not only helps her but also helps others.

I want to admit something….I have done wrong also (big surprise).

I have never spread rumors or physically hurt someone but I have done my part to create stigma towards those with mental health issues.

In my own desperation to feel normal I would gladly point out the people there were “more fucked up” than I was and mock them.

“At least I don’t pull out my hair.”

“At least I’ve never had to stay at the hospital.”

“They’re weird for talking to themselves, I don’t do that.”

I began to call it “my world” and I didn’t want anyone to enter it unless I thought they should. This means that if I didn’t think you had a legitimate mental illness then I would become very angry and deny that there was anything wrong with you. I had to “protect” my world when it was really just my way of trying to cope with people who had mocked me being diagnosed with a mental illness or cope with those diagnosed friends receiving help and support that I hadn’t received.

As I began to grow up and understand more about myself became who I am today I realized that I had no right to say or think what I did. Part of this recognition came with admitting that people would look at me and say, “At least I don’t do that….” much like I had and knowing that I had no right to define and judge someones experiences.

So that brings me to now. When I see people “talking to themselves” or they’re doing something else that others might find strange I just know that, that’s their thing. It’s what they do and who are we to judge them for it? I do my best to educate people on mental health and how we perpetuate stigma and how we can stop it.

I am still guilty sometimes of doing, saying or thinking things I know I shouldn’t but I use those moments as an opportunity to critically think as to why I’m doing, saying or thinking this way. I always end up discovering something helpful that pushes me further along the path of growth.