Blog Archives
Inner Ninja
This song has been lifting me up lately 
“Nobody’s gonna see me comin’
Nobody’s gonna hear a sound
No matter how hard they tryin’
Nobody’s gonna bring me down
Nobody’s gonna see me comin’
Nobody’s gonna hear a sound
No matter how hard they tryin’
No stoppin’ me since I’ve found
My inner ninja”
Electro Swing to Help Me Cope
I recently discovered a DJ named Parov Stelar. I heard the song below on a car commercial and I am completely in love with his style of electro swing. I had heard of this genre of music before but had never actually heard a song. Electro swing combines electronic beats and swing music to create the most amazing upbeat music EVER! I have not stopped listening to his music! It keeps me going when I feel like dragging my feet.
Here’s another one just because!
3 Things I Learned This Week: Clinical Issues
We are on week 6! I got 10/10 on my last essay which was about discrodant couples (a couple where on individual is HIV+ and the other is HIV-). This week there is a quiz on what we’re learning about which is clinical issues.
Dr. Hagen spoke about the stages of HIV infection, Dr. Lennox gave examples of 6 patient cases of opportunistic infections and Dr. McDonnell Holstad spoke on medication adherence.
I’m going to do the 3 Things I Learned This Week Differently and just pick one point from each of the 3 lectures.
3 Things I Learned This Week
1. The WHO has developed different stages of HIV based off of different needs (ie: dependent on access to certain testing)- Hagen
2. Opportunistic Diseases, many of them are viruses we encounter frequently and fight off but due to the weakened immune system caused by HIV the body is not able to fight it- Lennox
3. Music as a motivator and education tool for medication adherence (LIVE Network)- McDonnell Holstad
Runs In The Family
“Runs In The Family”
Amanda Palmer
They give him prescriptions,
They shine bright lights on him
They say it’s genetic,
They say he can’t help it
They say you can catch it
But sometimes you’re born with it
My friend has blight
he gets shakes in the night
And they say there is no way
That they could have caught it in
Time takes its toll on him, it is traditional
It is inherited predisposition
All day I’ve been wondering
What is inside of me,
Who can I blame for it?
I say
It runs in the family,
this famine that carries me
To such great lengths
To open my legs
Up to anyone who’ll have me
It runs in the family,
I come by it honestly
Do what you want
‘Cause who knows
It might fill me up [echoes]
Fill me up [echoes]
My friend’s depressed,
She’s a wreck, she’s a mess
They’ve done all sorts of tests and
They guess it has something to do
With her grandmother’s grandfather’s grandmother
Civil war soldiers who
Badly infected her
My friend has maladies, rickets, and allergies
That she dates back to the 17th century
Somehow she manages, in her misery -
Strips in the city
And shares all her best tricks with
Me?
Well, I’m well.
Well, I mean I’m in hell.
Well, I still have my health
(At least that’s what they tell me)
If wellness is this, what in hell’s name is sickness?
But business is business!
And business
Runs in the family, we tend to bruise easily
Bad in the blood, I’m telling you ’cause
I just want you to know me
Know me and my family
We’re wonderful folks but
Don’t get too close to me
‘Cause you might knock me up [echoes]
Knock me up [echoes]
Mary have mercy.
Now look what I’ve done
But don’t blame me because
I can’t help where I come from
And running is something that we’ve always done
Well and mostly I can’t even tell what I’m running from
Run from their pity
From responsibility
Run from the country
And run from the city
I can run from the law
I can run from myself
I can run for my life
I can run into debt
I can run from it all
I can run till I’m gone
I can run for the office
And run from the ’cause
I can run using every
Last ounce of energy
I cannot
I cannot
I cannot
Run from my family
They’re hiding inside me
Corpses on ice
Come in if you’d like
But just don’t tell my family
They’d never forgive me
They say that I’m crazy
But they would say anything
If it would shut me up
Shut me up
Shut me up [echoes]
Shut me up [echoes]
Recovery by Frank Turner
~Recovery~
Frank Turner
Blacking in and out in a strange flat in east London. Somebody I don’t
Really know just gave me something to help set me down and stop me always
Thinking about you. And you know your life is heading in a questionable
Direction when you’re off in days with strangers and you can’t remember
Anything except way you sound when you told me you didn’t know what I
Should do.
It’s a long road out to recovery from here, a long way back to the light.
A long road out to recovery from here, a long way back to what’s right.
And so I wake up in the morning just like every other day and like every
Boring blues song I get swallowed by the pain, so I fumble for your figure
In the darkness just to make it go away. But you’re not lying there any
Longer and I know that it’s my fault so I been crawling on the floor and
Pounding on the walls and I’ve been divvying my darkness and serotonin
Boosters, cider and some kind of smelling salts.
A long road out to recovery from here, a long way back to the light. A
Long road out to recovery from here, a long road to making it right.
So on the first night we met you said well darling let’s make a deal, if
Anybody ever asks us well let’s say that we met in jail. And that’s the
Story that I’m sticking to like a southern face that comforts but today I
Need to hear some truth if I’m ever getting through this. Yea you once sent
Me a letter that said if I was lost at sea, close my eyes and catch a time
Idea and only think of me. Well darling now I’m sinking I’m as lost as
Lost can be and I’m hoping you can drag me fucking down and out to my
Recovery.
If you could just give me a sign and just a subtle little glimmer, a
Suggestion that you’d have me if I could only make me better then I’d walk
A little taller and stand a little stronger all the time. Cause I know you
Are a sinning but I think I can convince you cause people can get better
Baby if they really want to or at least that’s what I have to tell myself
If I’m hoping to survive.
It’s a long road out to recovery from here, a long road back to the light.
A long road out to recovery from here, a long way to making it right.
So darling, sweet lover, won’t you help me to recover,
Darling, sweet lover, won’t you help me to recover,
Darling, sweet lover, won’t you help me to recover,
Darling, sweet lover, one day this will all be over.
The Hurt Yourself Less Workbook: Things and People
Previously: YOU
Things and People Who Have Made You Who You Are
You may want to include family, friends, teachers, pets, illnesses, jobs, institutions, religion and beliefs, money, housing- anything you think is important.
My immediate family (Mom, Dad, sisters and grandmother)
My bestie
Social Work
The Madvocates
Elementary, High School and Post Secondary Education
My field placements
My Ex’s (B, R, and R, more notably)
Sex
My Current Partner
Depression
Self Harm
BPD
Books
Writing
Singing
Musical Theatre
Music
Suicide
Anti Oppression
Unnamed Trauma
My Mental Friends Forever (MFF, thx for fun term!!)
Advocacy
The Kids I Work With
My Song For January 28
This song is on the Just Dance 4 Wii game I have I relate to a lot of the lyrics and wanted to share the song with you all
Today will be a day of starting and catching up on workbooks! And doing dishes…..ugh.
“Oh No!”
I’m only after success
Don’t need a relationship
I’ll never soften my grip
Don’t want cash, don’t want card
Want it fast, want it hard
Don’t need money, don’t need fame
I just want to make a change
I just wanna change [x4]
[Chorus:]
I know exactly what I want and who I want to be
I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine
I’m now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy
Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no
One track mind, one track heart
If I fail, I’ll fall apart
Maybe it is all a test
Cause I feel like I’m the worst
So I always act like I’m the best
If you are not very careful
Your possessions will possess you
TV taught me how to feel
Now real life has no appeal
It has no appeal [x4]
[Chorus x2]
I’m gonna live, I’m gonna fly,
I’m gonna fail, I’m gonna die,
I’m gonna live, I’m gonna fly
I’m gonna fail, gonna die, die, die, die
[Chorus x2]
Da-da-dum…
Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no
Hope You’re Happy Now
“Hope You’re Happy Now”
You can call me a liar
I got so many names now
I can’t even deny it
You can call a thief and put up a fight
Bury me six feet under the ground
But if you think I look mad today
You should have seen me yesterday
You can call me a beauty
You can call me a beast
But it’s nobody’s business what I do or please
So this song is from me to you
You make me mad and you make me blue
Cause when you’re looking like I do
You know I can see you
We dance to the same groove
But I got the right move
Hope your happy now
But I’m not giving in
I hope you’re satisfied
With your bullshit and your lies
Hope your happy now
But I’m not giving up
I hope your satisfied
Can’t bury me alive
They call me a slut
Then call me a liar
Got so many names now
I can’t even deny it
They call me a thief
They put up a fight
Try bury me six feet under the ground
So this song is from me to you
You make me mad and you make me blue
You’re looking like I do
You know I can see you
We dance the same groove
But I got the right move
Hope your happy now
But I’m not giving in
I hope you’re satisfied
With your bullshit and your lies
Hope your happy now
But I’m not giving up
I hope your satisfied
Can’t bury me alive
Ha! Ha! Ha, ha!
Hope your happy now
But I’m not giving in
I hope you’re satisfied
With your bullshit and your lies
Hope your happy now
But I’m not giving up
I hope your satisfied
Can’t bury me alive
I hope your satisfied
Fuck you and fuck your lies
Daily Prompts x2
The year is drawing to a close. What would you put in a 2012 time capsule?
I have been involved in 2 time capsules in the past, both for the opening of new schools (one from 1995 and another from 2000). What I put in those ones had to do with probably what I thought I would be when I grew up. I can tell you now I did not grow up to become those things but that’s ok.
What I would put in now? A picture of myself with everyone in my life that is important. I would want to remember those people even if I wasn’t speaking with them when the time capsule was opened.
When will this time capsule be opened?! My other two haven’t been opened either!
Here are 10 songs that describe my past, present and future.
1. Crush by Mandy Moore- I had a crush on the same guy from gr. 6-8. This was my song to him! (I don’t talk to him anymore :p)
2. Get Over Yourself by Eden’s Crush- I performed a dance to this song when I was in gr. 6. Little did I know I would date idiots like the song describes….
3. Breaking the Habit by Linkin Park- Cutting….hard to break the habit.
4. Maneater by Nelly Furtado- I got the boys I wanted, when I wanted and how I wanted. End of story 
5. Tipsy by J-Kwon- Lots of teen drinking. It wasn’t that bad!
6. Drumming Song by Florence + The Machine- To the love of my life <3
7. Fighter by Christina Aguilera- I hope to always be a fighter!
8. Home by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros- I hope to always be with my love! There’s good things in store for us!
9. Locked Out of Heaven by Bruno Mars- I will always love my man
10. Sexy and I Know It by LMFAO- Speaks for itself!
