Thoughts Are All I Have

I’m not happy.

I want to be alone.

I don’t want to do anything.

I’m withdrawing.

I need to act but that takes so much effort.

I don’t have anything to say.

I’m trying to keep things going but I spend more time out of the house doing nothing these days.

I’m told it’s a phase.

I’m getting tired of people telling me what to do.

I can make my own decisions.

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11 thoughts on “Thoughts Are All I Have

  1. “Iā€™m trying to keep things going but I spend more time out of the house doing nothing these days.” I get it! good statement!
    i am in my 50s and they are still telling me what to do . . . it is as if they are saying “you are mi so we have to help you”, but they don’t understand, that is not the kind of help i need OR want! problem is, i don’t know what i need or want either! death will not come soon enough.

    • I hear ya. Sometimes sitting and letting things pass by feels like the answer. It’s not but like you mentioned, figuring out what you need can be hard especially when others are telling you what it is.

      Stay strong!

      • thanx, u 2! my thoughts want to bake bread, work in the garden, walk the dog, but the rest of me just laughs and says, “yer kidding, right?” somehow i HAVE to get my a** up and work. i keep taking deep breaths and say, OK, 1, 2, 3, NOW! more laughter . . . once i start i keep going, but get me started? HA! at the ned of the day i say, tomorrow, tomorrow i will bake bread, clean the house, walk the dog . . .it is so depressing. i hope they can find something to help people like us before my death. i am so tired. OK, 1, 2, 3 . . .! šŸ™‚ have the best day you can! I will be thinking of you!

  2. Thanks for your honesty, everyone. I feel as if I’m truly in hell right now & that nobody can understand, but somehow I know that you all can! And somehow, that makes me feel more accepting of myself & my reality . . . I am going through a divorce after 30 years of marriage & it’s the worst experience of my life so far. I hope I never experience this kind of pain again . . I have a “to do list” of things I’m trying to accomplish, important things like finding a job, but am having a helluva time getting off square one as I just sold my house of 23 plus years, the house where my grown daughter grew up in, the house where our beagle spent all 16 & 1/2 yrs. of her life, and the hse. where the majority of my marriage was lived out . . . I can’t focus & am trying to not be too tough on myself about that, but there are things I need to take care of in the meantime . . . I think I better just treat myself as if I’m me responding to someone else in need- that would probably work better, as I am my own worst critic . . . Appreciate you all . . . Positive vibes are goin’ out to you all, too . . . Sam

    • Positive vibes are being sent to you!

      Life changes are very unsettling. I find myself wishing I could fast forward and not worry about the pain. I’m sorry that your divorce is the worst experience of your life so far. I hope things improve safely and at a good pace. Maybe you need to take some time to grieve and take care of yourself before you pursue other things?

      Good luck Sam!!!

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