Motherhood & Madness: How Radical Acceptance is Changing My Life

Motherhood&Madness

 

It has been awhile! So many things have happened aside from giving birth to my son that I have really struggled to prioritize everything that needs to be done.

My son is almost 2 months old. These have been the most wonderful and challenging 2 months of my life. Around the third week after my son was born I found myself feeling very frustrated with the changes that were happening. I was sitting in the rocking chair around 3 am trying to get my son back to sleep. I was finding it very difficult and I sat in the chair saying to myself, “I hate this! I want to go to sleep!” I was coming closer and closer to tears. It suddenly dawned on me that I need to radically accept that the situation was happening. I needed to accept that I would find myself up at 3 am a lot (and I am every single morning without fail) and that my son would be fussy for various reasons. I needed to accept that my role as a parent involves sacrifices to ensure my child is fed, comfortable and safe. Radically accepting this doesn’t mean I’m ok with waking up at 3 am, it means that I am going to accept this is my reality because fighting it will do nothing except cause me pain.

I realized in that moment I also needed to change the narrative in my mind. Instead of thinking about how much I hate being awake at 3 am I decided to start thinking that these are bonding moments. Every moment I spend with my son is an opportunity to bond with him. I can see the positive effects of the hours I spend with my son such as getting his first real smiles and him looking to me for comfort when other people are holding him and he is upset. It’s an amazing connection that is worth the few months of broken sleep.

Radical acceptance and changing the narrative have made the past 7 weeks more enjoyable. I am not always successful since lack of sleep can increase emotions like sadness and anger and I am still successful most of the time as I acknowledge that this is allowed to be hard, I am allowed to be upset and that regardless I am doing the best I can for my son.

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10 thoughts on “Motherhood & Madness: How Radical Acceptance is Changing My Life

  1. I have always heard about radical acceptance, but never really got it until recently when I too suddenly just saw that there was no sense struggling in the moment I was in as it wasn’t going to change. So I realized my response to the situation had to change instead. you are right, it makes a difference.

    • Exactly!!! Some of our struggles we cannot change or cannot initially change. Figuring out how to cope with that instead of fighting it can feel pretty good when you get the hang of it! Thank you for sharing!

  2. Loved this! I went through this exact same thing, its crazy.. I know it may seem like forever and the worst to be up at 3 am but I’m telling you it gets better! Hang in there momma! I’m pretty sure I thought the same thing at the time and I did a lot of crying too lol its normal. πŸ™‚ If you ever need to talk or anything ❀

    • Thank you for your kind words! I was reading your blog post called 3 am feedings and then my son woke up so I haven’t commented yet! I look forward to reading your blog! My mom friends are limited…kind of non-existent lol

      • Your very welcome! Oh and thank you! πŸ€— us moms need to stick together anytime you need to talk I’m available ☺️

  3. Pingback: Motherhood & Madness: How Radical Acceptance is Changing My Life β€” Pride in Madness – Sarah's Attic Of Treasures

  4. congradulations on the birth of your son! I’m excited for you! What did you call him? The baby stage when they are only a month or two old is so beautiful. Cherish those moments with him, he’ll grow up so fast! xxx

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